1. |
Free
04:17
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Go away.
Ple-ease
Go away
Ple-ease
Let me have at least the freedom to choose how I’m gonna die
Why give my body life if my choices are not mine?
I wanna be free of your gaze
I wanna be free of your gaze
I’m sick of being trapped in this room with no means of escape,
Except to let the noose take me away
I wanna be free of your gaze
Show the way
Ple-ease
Show the way
Ple-ease
There’s no freedom to be found within my mind
It's not freedom if all my choices only make me die
I wanna be free of my self
I wanna be free of my self
I wanna be free of the things that are slowly killing me
Before I up and lose myself I wanna be
Free of my self
Sa-ave me-ee
Sa-ave me-ee
Fre-ee me-ee
Fre-ee me-ee
I wanna be free of my self
I wanna be free of my self
I wanna be free of the things that are slowly killing me
Before I up and lose myself I wanna be
Free of my self
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2. |
The 18th of October
04:48
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Dear Mother, expect to see me back sometime this fall
They say it’s just a matter of time before the red coats break the line
There was so much loss, but we won, all-in-all
And oh, Mother, I sometimes think about that school that I applied for
I don’t regret staying to serve; there’s a lot I could have learned
But I’d rather learn it in the land that Father died for
Oh I’ll come home soon, don’t worry about me
We'll finally be free, and isn’t that the dream?
I know it’s hard for you too, and I know if dad could see,
He’d come to life again to die again to save his family
But please, don’t worry,
Oh please, don’t worry
About me
Dear Mother, I remember when I left you back in May
It’s now the 15th of October and I hope when this war’s over
I can hurry back in time for Christmas Day
But Mother, bad news from the general, yet again
Please keep brother from enlisting, I know he wants to be just like me,
But it's no war for a young man like him
I’ll try to come home soon, pray that God gives that to me
We'll finally be free, and isn’t that the dream?
I know it’s hard for you too, and I know if dad could see,
He’d come to life again to die again to save his family
But please, don’t worry,
Oh please, don’t worry
About me
Dear Mother, they shot Thomas, and he might lose his life
They’re gonna amputate his leg, even still he might not live,
Please pray to god that he survives to see his wife
Oh, my Mother, it’s now the 16th, and I went up to that hill
Father’s grave is just a little wooden cross, among the rows
It’s been a year now, but the pain’s enough to kill
If I could only come home soon, I’d be so happy
I just want us to be free, and I’ll die for that dream
I know it’s so hard for you, and I know if dad could see,
He’d come to life again to die again to save his family
Oh I’m starting to worry,
Oh I’m worried
But we’ll see
Dear Mother, I don’t know how much more I can take
Thomas died of an infection, but I believe what killed him,
Was the pain of leaving her heart to break.
Oh I’m worried,
I’m so, so worried
I’m scared to death that every breath will be my last
And if a bullet doesn’t kill me, the thought of leaving you behind will
To David’s Mother, we regret to inform you of your loss
Your son was shot down on the 18th of October; he was on a hill
Staring at a cross.
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3. |
Empty Eyes
05:10
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Empty sky, the sun has set,
The moon’s asleep, hasn’t risen yet,
And us bandits are going down to the sea
Empty safes we left behind,
We stole their gold, now we’re off to find
A better life, in some other country
But I grow concerned when I see your face
Your mind is in some other place
I want to give you all that you desire
But it’s getting dark, and it’s getting dire
But your eyes are growing emptier day by day,
And I don’t know what else to say
Are you sorry that you chose this life?
You could have been a pastor’s wife.
But you left the church, and you left him at the altar.
I used to be a praying man,
But I lost my way, and found my hand
Pointing a gun at your father.
But I feel regret when I look into your eyes
You’re thinking of the life you left behind
I tried to give you all that you desire
Cause it’s getting dark, and it’s getting dire
But your eyes are growing emptier day by day,
And I don’t know what else to say
So give me a reason, just tell me why
And we’ll be leaving this group behind
Whisper in my ear, or just make a sign
And we’ll have disappeared by the sunrise
Empty soul, your faith is gone
You lost the hope that you counted on
The days grow shorter, and the nights grow longer
And your eyes are growing emptier day by day,
Oh, I don’t know what else to say
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4. |
Dreamaches
04:00
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It's 4 A.M. and I still got the sinking feeling in my chest
Melancholy overtakes my heart
These dreams they drive me on, but soon they’ll drive me crazy
I can’t go to sleep cause
Lately, I’ve been getting
Dreamaches
And all these aspirations are gonna break my heart
I know it’s probably naïve to think
That I could ever get that far
But I’m one for wishful thinking
That smile, it makes me sick, I know what I am missing
I’m still longing for what I can’t have
I still let my wander - I must be looking for pain
Cause that’s all I find there
I am asking for these
Dreamaches
And all these aspirations are gonna break my heart
I know it’s probably naïve to think
That I could ever get that far
But I’m one for wishful thinking
I won’t go to sleep, oh
I won't go to sleep, oh
I won't go to sleep, no
I won't go to sleep.
I won’t go to sleep, oh
I won't go to sleep, oh
I won't go to sleep, no
I won't go to sleep.
Oh, lately I’ve been getting
Dreamaches
And all these aspirations are gonna break my heart
I know it’s probably naïve to think
That I could ever get that far
But I’m one for wishful thinking
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5. |
Little Mining Town
04:35
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Hey, how have you been?
It’s been a while since we’ve seen you ‘round these parts.
You should know, your brother ran off again.
Something ‘bout a girl that broke his heart.
You’ll find the town hasn’t changed.
A few came, a few died, it’s all the same.
We’re still seeking our fortune, seeking our fame,
Here on these wide western plains.
So welcome back friend to our little mining town.
The grass is all dead but we won’t let it bring us down.
The sun’s shining bright – a little hot for my taste,
But we won’t let this chance go to waste.
Did you attend, to your business back home?
Order your affairs and hug your mom?
I see you couldn’t convince your love to follow you west.
Don’t be too sad, she’s just like the rest.
You won’t believe what we’ve found since you left.
So much gold, that we must be blessed.
It might be hard to find food, and the heat makes me ache.
But we will never let our spirit break.
So welcome back friend to our little mining town.
The grass is all dead but we won’t let it bring us down.
The sun’s shining bright – a little hot for my taste,
But we won’t let this chance go to waste.
Oh the stars are shining so bright over California
The gold is calling my name in California
The same call that brought our fathers to this nation’s bringing me further still
And I know that I’ve found my home in California
So welcome back friend to our little mining town.
The grass is all dead but we won’t let it bring us down.
The sun’s shining bright – a little hot for my taste,
But we won’t let this chance go to waste.
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6. |
Rock and Roll
03:03
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Have you had any luck in your years-long search?
Has the money helped take away all the hurt?
Have you found any joy in awards or your title?
Are the accolades just a pointless trifle?
If you give it all up I think you’ll be surprised
When you chase peace it's peace that you’ll find
A little music takes away a world of crying.
Cause have you thought that maybe you’re wrong?
So stop your search, start singing a song
Cause there’s more to life than just waiting to die,
And if you need proof just look at the sky
There’s so much beauty, only not enough time
So turn up the music and close your eyes
And let the rock and roll take you away
So give up the money, don’t worry ‘bout the people
Less 4-0-1, more 1-4-5, no one likes a guy who only lives for the field
So pick up a book and put down your pride
Instead of wasting time chasing girls you won’t keep,
You could listen to Buckley, and Dylan, and Beatles
But I know that you’re just gonna roll your eyes
Cause have you thought that maybe you’re wrong?
Stop wasting time, start singing a song
Cause there’s more to life than just waiting to die,
And if you need proof just look at the sky
There’s so much beauty, only not enough time
So turn up the music and close your eyes
And let the rock and roll take you away
Yeah there’s so much more than just waiting to die,
But you don’t need proof cause you’ve seen the sky
There’s so much beauty, only not enough time
So turn up the music and close your eyes
And let the rock and roll take you away
Yeah let the rock and roll take you away
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7. |
Ozymandias
02:56
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You’re just a statue in the sand,
Don’t got a hand to hold for me to lead you home.
You used to be a king of kings,
But now your crown is down there, all alone,
Turned to stone.
So put away the notion of who you are
Cause that old you is far gone
And once you’ve gotten it through your stone head,
That you’re dead, then we can move on
Oh, it’s not space but time that separates you,
Generations back is where you belong
They used to sing of your grace and rhyme,
That your reign would be blessed and long
Don’t try to save face, your face is broken
Into pieces in the sand
But if you show a trace of penitence,
I’ll help you find that long forgotten land
Oh Ozymandias, I’ll lead you home
Do you remember former times,
when rulers cried and shook in fear when they heard your name?
But the wind and rain, it took their place,
And your weathered face shows nothing more than shame.
So put away the notion of who you are
Cause that old you is far gone
And once you’ve gotten it through your stone head,
That you’re dead, then we can move on
Oh, it’s not space but time that separates you,
Generations back is where you belong
They used to sing of your grace and rhyme,
That your reign would be blessed and long
Don’t try to save face, your face is broken
Into pieces in the sand
But if you show a trace of penitence,
I’ll help you find that long forgotten land
Oh, it’s not space but time that separates you,
Generations back is where you belong
They used to sing of your grace and rhyme,
That your reign would be blessed and long
Don’t try to save face, your face is broken
Into pieces in the sand
But if you show a trace of penitence,
I’ll help you find that long forgotten land
Oh Ozymandias, I’ll lead you ho – o – ome
Oh Ozymandias, I’ll lead you ho – o – ome
Oh Ozymandias, I’ll lead you home
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8. |
Little Gavroche
00:35
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Little Gavroche doesn't need you to save him
He's doing just fine on his own
He's got a gun without a trigger
And a soul without a home
He'll pick your pocket and your purse
With a fine toothed comb
Ever since he was young
He's been learning to roam
The streets of Paris that his parents
Left him to all alone
It's a wonder that he ever learned to love at all
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9. |
Give Me Your Hand
03:54
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Please don’t give me your hand,
I’ll just nail it to the cross
Do you not understand
What my freedom will cost?
They ordered you dead;
A heretic in disguise.
But my heart fills with dread
As I look in your eyes
I do not know what I have done to deserve this
You gave it all up for me, knowing my purpose
Oh, my heart breaks as I wash your blood from my hands
But as I wash your blood I know it’s washing me of my sins
I played a game for your clothes,
As your blood hit the ground
When you prayed for our souls,
How sweet was the sound.
As I looked on you shake
I wanted to doubt
But when the earth began to quake
My sin died on that mount
I do not know what I have done to deserve this
You gave it all up for me, knowing my purpose
Oh, my heart breaks as I wash your blood from my hands
But as I wash your blood I know it’s washing me of my sins
I will look you in the face, and betray you
Oh, behold my disgrace, I pray you
You know full well what I did and what I’ll do
Even so, you’ll still give me your hand
Even so, you’ll still give me that beautiful hand, to die
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10. |
The Monster
11:47
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Hello my dear. Is it summertime already?
You’re looking fine in your summer dress.
Though fall is gone, and winter too,
I have reason to believe your spirit’s
Falling like the leaves did when they died.
Please come outside. The monster’s not so
Scary in the sunlight. It will be alright
I don’t yet have an answer but, I promise
We will find one soon.
Until then let’s bide our time and
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
I know it’s hard to hear me when the monster’s grown so loud
But I’m watching you sink deeper and I want to pull you out
I know you can remember when your soul wasn’t at war
So let me help you find that place once more.
Hello again, my closest friend
How’s the art been going?
I know the future doesn’t look so bright
Oh, but there are starry nights ahead, I promise.
I know you feel unloved
Feel like your work, is worthless
I know your mind is broken
But I promise you have purpose
Don’t take the gun
Don’t take the gun
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
Why is it that the ones who see the most wonder in life
So easily succumb to the dark?
Why is it that the monster’s growl rings thunderous in the lives
Of the men who pour their souls into their art?
Hello, soldier, this war’s made you older
Than you should have to be, you’re only 19
But you’ve seen and done things that you’d pay to forget
The true nature of man’s been laid bare and your head is
So numb. It’s all quiet.
I know you’d rather be gone
Your life and your home, your dreams and goals are dead.
You can’t tell who the monster is anymore.
When two men hold a gun to the head of each other, who is the evil one?
I know that you’d rather it end, but for now
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
The bullets flying overhead
The fuses crying call the dead
The soldiers dying breaking bread
The monster lying in your head
The men are buying time to live
The people trying hard to give
The generals sighing won’t forgive
Chains shake - the monster’s slumber ends
Just be
If only just for a while
Maybe just for a while
Oh, be
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11. |
Omnia Vanitas
04:25
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12. |
Yet
04:37
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It was seventeen – oh – two and life in France was growing rather dull
How easily my heart jumped for you, when you said hello in Sainte Chapelle
I ran home to my mom, all out of breath, sweat running down my arms.
She asked, “son, what’s wrong?” and I said “mom, you won’t believe it,
But I’ve found the girl that I wanna fall in love with.
I just haven’t done it yet.
That summer was a mess of love notes written - most trashed, some were sent
I tried to impress your mother with my manners, and my wit.
We’d have short talks in your back yard, under the gaze of your over-protective dad
He pulled me aside and asked, “is this a game?”
And I said “it’s not”
I know I wanna ask her to marry me soon.
I just haven’t done it yet.
We were married in the fall. We went up to the coast to be alone.
We talked of how we both used to long, to set out on the waves and see the world
But we were still just simple Paris kids, no money, so we couldn’t travel far
But it was carried off by the tides, cause we were happy in each other’s arms
And as I looked in your eyes I said,
“I’m gonna see all I need to see by spending my life with you
I just haven’t done it yet.”
That was all eleven years ago, The only memory still clear’s your face
My friends tell me “you shouldn’t live alone” Go find someone, and get out of this place.
I see them with their kids and their loves, it hurts my soul to watch them smile
They’re saying it’s okay to move on, and I probably will.
I’ll probably move on, find joy, and fall in love again.
I’ll come to terms with the fact that you’re gone.
I just haven’t done it yet.
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13. |
Here
04:09
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Oh, I’m miles down the road
From where the fight broke out
And you swore you’d never speak to me again.
I was lying, that smile was a fake,
When said that’s fine with me,
Cause I could barely hold back the crying
And I’ll wipe the blood
From the cut you gave me when you threw the glass
I want to say that we shouldn't have brought it up
But it’s so hard not to hold on to the past
I’m gonna walk away
From here
I’m gonna walk away
From here
Cause I’d start to cry if I saw your face
I guess it had to be this way
If I went back in time,
I’d only change how it hurt when you heard it
When I think back to yesterday
We were trying so hard to laugh,
But the tears were trying harder to surface
You were only starting to heal
From the life that you were living when we met
The screaming was slowly killing us
But it was the silence that condemned our love to death
I’m gonna walk away
From here
I’m gonna walk away
From here
Cause I’d start to cry if I saw your face
I’m gonna walk away
From here
I’m gonna walk away
From here
Cause I’d start to cry if I saw your face
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14. |
The Storm
04:39
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Listen to the waves storm the hull
Listen to the sails against the wind
Listen to the sound of it all
And know that you and I have reached the end
Listen to the waves storm the hull
Listen to the sails against the wind
Listen to the sound of it all
And know that you and I have reached the end
The tides that carried us so far,
Are tidal waves that over loom
The winds that pushed us ever on,
Are hurricanes that spell our doom
And now the waves, that rocked us to sleep
Will finally pull us down into the deep
And in the dark, we’ll sleep forevermore
Until our souls, find their way to the shore
Listen to the waves storm the hull
Listen to the sails against the wind
Listen to the sound of it all
And know that you and I have reached the end
Listen to the waves storm the hull
Listen to the sails against the wind
Listen to the sound of it all
And know that you and I have reached the end
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15. |
A Dream
04:58
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Last night I dreamed that I was older
And that time had let everything fall into place.
A peaceful night was on its way, all my troubles fell away
And soon today would be another yesterday
And everything had turned out okay
As the red turned into gray, I heard the forest call my name
So I left my house and went into the twilight
A song began to ring, spread through the forest like a flame,
And it led me to a valley in the cold night
In the empty valley stood a lonely purple tree,
It’s shadow looming over a bed of leaves
The man in black stood there, and he beckoned me come near
To join his friends to sing away the eve’
I was sitting ‘neath the stars, Dylan strumming his guitar,
Singing ‘bout the boy who ventured far away.
And if that hard rain ever falls, I won’t have to wander far,
To find the sun heralding a new day.
Then everyone grew quiet, and it seemed that for a while,
We were all sent into dreaming by the song
The man’s eyes gave way to tears, and when I asked him of his trial
He said no dream achieved could ever end the longing
The fireflies came near, and in the darkness, they appeared
to be lonely stars, floating in the sky.
And I was talking with the man whose music made me who I am
As the tiny stars began a lullaby
All of a sudden I heard a drum, the rhythmic beating rumbling,
And four men began to come down from the hill.
They were the Sergeant’s band, and they’d come from foreign lands
With mind’s full of ideas and hearts full of song.
And we sang along.
I heard the midnight hour ring, from a clock so far away
That by now, it had to be one or two
And as we lay beneath the lilac tree,
A friend appeared and began to sing hallelujah
The music woke the sun from sleep, the singing led my heart to peace
And on that hill, there were smiles all around.
That crowd of dreamers all understood that we’d have each other and that was good
So with warm hearts, we said our goodbyes
And I walked in a stupor towards the sky
Then I opened my eyes.
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Caleb Caldwell Nashville, Tennessee
If David Lynch wrote pop songs.
Nashville, TN.
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